Apparently I wrote this a year ago...a bit dramatic though. Some feelings still lingers here and there...

Fleeting emotions

Every night I tell my self

"you're ugly, you're worthless"

Then I cry myself to sleep

To put myself into the darkness

Wishing to wake up to a place

where no one knows me

To start anew? No, to be alone

I cannot stop these feelings

Always wanting to hurt myself

Taking pleasure in degrading myself

I am out of my mind

Wanting to go dreaming forever

Escaping from reality

Hating where I am

I am not worthy to this life I am living

I need to suffer more

I need pain to wake me up

But I am scared of everything

I am a coward

Always running away

A waste living in this world

I am tired of hurting myself

But I keep doing it

I deserved to be like this

I keep failing and failing

Falling down into the dark abyss

Where I belong

A twisted mind, A foul soul