Apparently I wrote this a year ago...a bit dramatic though. Some feelings still lingers here and there...

Fleeting emotions

Every night I tell my self

"you're ugly, you're worthless"

Then I cry myself to sleep

To put myself into the darkness

Wishing to wake up to a place

where no one knows me

To start anew? No, to be alone

I cannot stop these feelings

Always wanting to hurt myself

Taking pleasure in degrading myself

I am out of my mind

Wanting to go dreaming forever

Escaping from reality

Hating where I am

I am not worthy to this life I am living

I need to suffer more

I need pain to wake me up

But I am scared of everything

I am a coward

Always running away

A waste living in this world

I am tired of hurting myself

But I keep doing it

I deserved to be like this

I keep failing and failing

Falling down into the dark abyss

Where I belong

A twisted mind, A foul soul 

just by chance

i was just browsing my old files and i happen to read my old works. i forgot and couldn't even believe that i wrote the these! (hahaha) anyway, if you happen to find this site and read these, please don't laugh :)

“My cheap life”

-inspired by leslee

And there I sat alone

People passing by

Not one glance did I see

I am like a garbage can

People throw their waste at me

Doesn’t care about my feelings

Insensitive people, I hate them

Oh, my life is unfortunate

Luck also never liked me

I used to hate everything

Until you taught me how to love

I used to think I’m hated

Until you showed me your care

I used to feel very lonely

Until you came into my life

‘Hey, Kan’

I met you when I had no one else

At first glance, I knew you were the one

The one that would bring me out

To be at my side when I face the world

You taught me how to laugh

When I only had sadness as my expression

You brought excitement in my time

When I thought life was dull to live

I am able to stand up on my own

Because you’re always there to support me

I am able to hold my head up high

Because you put confidence inside me

There were times that we were confused

Misunderstandings were common

And regrets take place inside us

Despite these, we still stayed strong

So now I say my thanks to you

For the memories you gave to me

Good and bad, I shall treasure them

For I know, you’re always there for me

‘Oblivious‘

~Jchi

In the world I live on I can see nothing else Darkness being beckoned Where no one ever dwells No matter how I run I can’t escape from it My pain has long begun Torn apart, bit by bit I seek for my freedom Something I have longed for This desire will become Feeble in my heart’s core

‘I’m a nonentity’ That is, I shall not say But doubt is inside me I cannot move away Somehow I became weak To keep on going forth Here has gone chaotic Vanished, had my life’s worth Drifting to emptiness Existence became void Being here is useless My soul has been destroyed

Lifetime Hero

In our lives, we consider many people as our heroes. Everyday, we may meet people who unexpectedly help us when we're in trouble. They may have cheered you up knowing that you're depressed. They come at the right time when you need encouragement and strength. They inspire us to continue on when things go wrong. They put smiles on your faces when you're in pain. These people can be consider as everyday heroes. They could be your family, friends, neighbors or even strangers who happen to pass by. These people teach and remind you the value of life.

But to me. my best and top most hero is God, Himself. Every time I think of Him when I'm in trouble my mind would be peaceful and calm. I can talk to Him freely with my problems and troubles. I thank Him for giving me the gift of life and for the people around who loves me. He's not just my everyday hero but also my lifetime hero and will always be.

Our Lady of Triumph

You may have heard about the Fort Santiago (Cotta Fort and Shrine) in Ozamiz City. Every 16^th of July, my family always goes to the Cotta shrine and attends the mass. It’s to celebrate the feast day of Our Lady of Triumph. Inside the chapel and outside Fort Santiago, on the wall facing the bay is an image of the Virgin Mary in the pink and blue attire. The image on the Cotta’s wall is believed to be miraculously growing and has been the object of pilgrimage of devotees.

Legend tells of the miraculous intercessions of the Virgin during the Muslim raids to which the fort was often subjected. Oftentimes the fort was undermanned due to its distance from the main Spanish garrisons and the infrequent visits of the armada whose principal anchorage in the south was Cebu. But the fort had always withstood even the fiercest Muslim attacks, a feat which they could attribute only to the Blessed Mother's intercession.

So every now and then, people pray for her and celebrate her feast day. I too believed in the miracles of our Blessed Mary and knows that she's always protecting us every time.

Activity 7

We're Heating Up

On the day I lost my umbrella, I thought I had to buy another one as soon as possible. Why? Well it's because of the heat of the sun. I can't stand it especially at noon time. It hurts your head in less than five minutes if you don't have any protection. It gives you headache and worst, heatstroke. Even at eight to nine in the morning, the heat of the sun hurts.

This is not normal. Right now, our ozone layer is depleting and some people are making it worst. Cutting trees is one of the factors that led into this. I don't know why they still continue to illegally cut them. The diminishing of trees could also lead to flash floods, landslides and weather change. Right now we are experiencing these things and it is very alarming.

I wonder if it's not too late. But no matter how I look at it, some people are still not willing to save our earth and couldn't care less. I don't understand them being insensitive about these things which is very important. I hope that someday, even if it's little by little, people will open there eyes and see and what's happening and that they will change and help solve these problems.

Activity 6

Fun-filled Memories

When I was on my fourth year, on the month of September, a rumor about having a field trip on the last week of October was circulating in our campus. I was very excited and a bit hesitant. Excited because, what else could be the reason, it's a field trip of course! It's where you will spend time with your friends and could even make new ones. It's where you go to different places and get to learn new things. But why also hesitant? Well, I'm scared that I won't be able to go on this one too. When I was a 2nd year, there was a 3 days-2 nights field trip to Davao and I wasn't able to go because at that time it was a short notice so my mother wasn't able to prepare for the financial matters. When my classmates went back, I was feeling a little left out. So I was wondering then if I could join this trip. I told my mom about it and said that we'll just see to it. Well, God did answer my prayers. I was so happy that I could join at last! It was a 3days and 2 nights field trip to Cagayan de Oro City.

We went to two factories, Asia Brewery and Pepsi, we had a tour around it and also got free drinks. They were huge and cool. It was my first time to enter a factory so I was really curious and amazed. Also, we got to tour around a museum of a university in Cagayan (sorry, I forgot the name). The ABS-CBN station, we also entered it and got to see what's the inside. I got to ride a horse in Manresa farm. It was cool! I think I had six rounds riding the horse. She was a mare. On my 4th round, the person who was assisting me got the horse to run fast. My hat flew and I was shouting and laughing. I was excited at the same time scared because I don't know how to make it slow. Fortunately, the man was able to catch up with us. It was really awesome. I also almost had another horse incident. It was on another place (also forgot the name), the horse I was riding and the other horse of my classmate got a fight. They where kicking each other! I held tight on the rope, I thought I was gonna fall. Good thing the caretaker came on time. I had mixed feelings again, fear and excitement. I got angry to my classmate because he was the one who made our horses fight but also was thankful because it was really a cool experience (even though it was dangerous).

To sum it up, it was really fun and unforgettable . I was very thankful and glad that I was able to come home safely and with a big smile on my face. I treasure those memories and will never forget the times I had with my friends. I hope that when you go to a field trip, don't be gloomy about it because it will surely be one of a kind experience.

Connections

Each of us are connected to one another, our actions, words, thoughts, feelings. We should treasure these because our bonds with other people are important and these help us in our lives. We need these in times when we are in an unlikely situation. But sometimes we can't avoid the times when it breaks or falls apart. Sooner or later, misunderstandings and fights will surface up. We tend to build walls around us thinking that this will solve things but it doesn't. It will make things worst. So from time to time, we should rebuild our 'bridge', patch some holes or even better if we make the foundations stronger.

Don't waste time, don't wait to let it become worst. If its been damaged then rebuild it quickly. We should not destroy things, making and building things (not walls) are the best. We could also help others. We have the gift of creating bonds with other people so we should use it. Help them to build and rebuild theirs. It's not good to runaway or ignore our problems. So remember, it's never too late to build and fix things up.